People Come and Go. (What's in between?)

Sometimes theory is not enough. in fact, it will never be, if not followed by some steps after. And sometimes, it is really difficult to have all of those words to implement in one's life. they are nice to read, gives the sensation of relief for some period of times, but soon when i am faced to a real thing in life that requires certain real skill, i still am fucked. in fact, more fucked because i know what is a right thing to do, yet none is done right.

and at that times, when you can not work theory because they only spins in your head, you need something more. something more solid, more real, and something that you can feel.

then someone comes to you, flowing the life through himself and show you that it is possible. comes from nowhere, this person that you don't know existence a second ago, gives you life-push! it is possible to do this and that, to be this and that. That person, open my eyes of all the possibilities in life. Showing me action that comes from authentic purpose of soul, radiates out. "Move! move! move!"

Since that moment, when you like someone because you purely like it and not because you want to be liked, you start to see. The beauty shows.

i have opened my eyes all since born but it felt like my vision got blurred as i grew up, as i added more and more years in my life. but now that my eye is a bit more opened, i got realized by another life surprise. it is that, those beautiful people are here, close. they are around. Mom, dad, brother, friends.

cliche? i know! but try this : distract your self of your future lover fantasy and start to see whatever and whoever is here now.

I spent most of my times thinking about other place when i'm in public. letting those window of abundance go. Letting those faces of stranger I passed by just gone with not any impression.

I saw my friends laughing. there was usually nothing more than the big smile and teeth that I am sometime bored to see :p. But when I look close, hey it is beautiful and my mind says "you are beautiful..  move on and love yourself. you should."

People are damn beautiful.

they come and (always) go. what's in between is all that important.

Not easy for me to love. I am faraway close to ideas of "lover". But hey I can't figure out any other thing that makes more sense than to love.

I put this quote on the page sidebar. But this quotes have too big relevancy i can't deny sharing.

Don’t ask what love can make, or can do.

Look at the colors of the world!

Today, like every other day, we wake up empty, and scared.

Don’t open the door to the study and begin reading.

Take down a musical instrument and start to play.

Let the beauty you love be what you do.

There are a hundred ways to kneel and kiss the ground.

Be patient.

-Rumi

This gives me a little goosebump : Let the beauty you love be what you do.

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Beginning of Holiday

As I scrolled down the posts and have a quick read, there are plenty of them with cheer tone opening saying how happy I am having this holiday, or how crap I feel when it's about to meet the end. Well probably this is another one.

HAPPY HOLIDAAAY. :D

My holiday has been going pretty well so far, nothing so glimmering and stuff but not boring too. It's pretty sad seeing people in holiday stating how bored they are while I remember they were so enthusiastic welcoming the holiday on the end of the schooldays. That gives you a bit of idea that no ideal place is somewhere to be found, to fit you well if you can not enjoy whatever happens now. wo ho im starting again.

well about holiday, My friend and I had committed  to create and post an artwork each day as the stimulation of our productivity. Yeah this holiday is pretty crucial and would be such a big lost if not spent well.  Because once we make a comeback on the first day of school, we will be on our last grade of highschool and ought to face bunch of university entrance preparation, such as national exam and other additional exercises and exam, probably in order to get your score higher so it will helps you on fitting a seat of certain good university. (yeah people criticize this whole bullshit education system.)

Thinking about how busy it might be, we should make time really well for the whole out of academy activity now. After a long pause on making new artwork, finally I decided to paint something. The canvas was out of stock at home so I went around the corner and found my old artwork which was pretty mess. It was made on my 5th grade, an attempt of practicing what I've just saw an impressionist painter did.

After making lots of strokes with a little experiment, this how it turned out.

It was enough to stimulate me doing another painting so I created another, not yet going out to have new stock of canvas so I rolled around and found another old painting which the color was too dark so I put random color over it and ciaaaaaaaaattt!

they are acrylic on canvas.

I have some more paintings done this holiday but probably on next post.

thanks, have a nice holiday!

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Missing Out : Speed Painting Videos

as I'm not being so update with arts project I was working on back in the days, here I'm going to get this blog a catch of what its missing out.

after an observation over my own self ( i guess i have my own asylum nurse inside my head :p) , I can say that I am a person who's easily affected by what I watch, and that can be good or dangerous. that's why I make my own limit of what my head consumes during my self knowledge progress, to decrease distraction. but the commitment didn't seem work really well, though. haha. That's why my self feels like pulled in two opposite direction.

whatever. reason why I talk about this is because I watched a lot of speed painting and video blogs the artists on youtube created. and they're amazing. After that, as i told you how easy i'm infected, I put the camera on and let it record me painting on the canvas.

and when i was done editing them and watch it like over and over again, i got a kind of soothing feeling. seeing your own hand moves and create something your head and heart pour on, is just a nice thing.

hope you enjoy. :)

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Connection

i love this anonymous quote : "My Soul and Yours are very old friend"

acrylic + sewing thread

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"Seeking Through The Darkness."

Been few months leaving the last post on my blog haha I'm sorry very bad of me.

it's 2014 in few days ahead, but so what, we should be charged by new hope, dream, and action by every day, even second, not once a year. number is illusion of "real" life. well, i think we're all schizophrenia disorder, who can't differentiate which one is reality and illusion.

There's time when you start to think who you really are. Sometime you have to find the reality by going deep and deeper into yourself, find what's all shown on the way and what has been buried down.


I made a video of my speedpainting titled "Seeking Through The Darkness."

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Blood, Bitter, Dark, Mystery

In this lovely holiday, most of my time is spent for reading, reading and writing. not so much time for art so far, but now the passion feels starting to bloom again.

But i thankful for loving those three things. reading, writing, and creating (painting or drawing). because they all stick to eachother. they affect eachother. while reading, i create my own state of fantasy, opinion. my improving thought is poured through writing.
the emotion and fantasy i get when i read book, is poured through painting. on my canvas.
afterward, i write about the result here.

i think everything sticks to eachother. everything. we just have no idea about the complexity of how brain works. absorb things and mix it up, and where will it end up is up to you. Praise God.

in the lovely morning of... well i don't know what day is it now. (effect of holiday) I woke up and had a glance on my painting tools. i really miss that feeling when i paint. after little bit thinking of what to paint, i decide not to think.

the emotion effect of psycho thriller novel titled kitarsis I read over last night is still fresh in me. blood, bitter, dark, mystery. the emotion is still strong.

so I give it all to my intuition.

and here what it gives back.

acrylic on A3 Canson watercolor pad.

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The Untold City

well it's only 2 days left until i finally back to school again. it feels like the last post of my holiday welcome cheers was only written few days ago. please bring me back to the first day of holiday please oh please T_T bafttt, ;_; okay, face this. back to school. lost in daily routinity. drown under stack of notes full of wild alphabets and numbers that will be meaningless by next year. really, i wont make it sounds that bad... but.... it does..

nevermind, they say rainbow will appear after the rain.

and well.. as the holiday time I had was already less than 55 hours, i decided to make a painting. i was interested to try abstract painting of city so here we go.

I really do enjoy how i can let the brush dancing salsa freely on canvas as a dance floor and create the colors for every move. and ended up like...

i name this "the untold city"

it's using acrylic on 20x20 cm sized canvas. done in 2 hours and half.

thanks people, enjoy the last seconds of your holiday wisely! good luck! :p

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